I want to rant!
I’ve been in an irritated mood all this week. I’m not 100% sure what started it. Perhaps it never had a start. Maybe I’m just a perpetually irritated kind of guy.
For a while I’ve wanted to make another blog just so I could have a place to go and half-rant and half-joke. But things like that always seem to come back and bite me. Damn shame because I’ve got some interesting, crazy, and funny ideas that I think should be implemented.
Hmmm, I wonder if George Carlin needs some help with writing.
So this blog entry is going to be me letting off some steam before I explode. It’s just some quick thoughts and rants I’ve got.
If you’re easily offended, you should probably stop reading this now.
Even though I’ve cleaned it up a little from what I really want to say.
Number One:
When in a conversation at the game store, if the story about what your character did requires more than a single breath to tell, then don’t bother telling the story. First you give a little starter sentence. If the person you’re talking to responds and asks for more information, then you’ve piqued their interest and you may continue. Otherwise, move along little boy, you’re irritating me.
Number Two:
If you’ve ever cheated while gaming and are 21 years old or more, then you don’t understand the true meaning of the word “challenge”.
A real challenge in D&D is when you’ve had to look at your character sheet in the hopes of finding something, anything that will get you out of the scrape you’re in.
If you’ve ever rolled the dice until you got the number you wanted, then left it there and said you rolled it, or if you’ve ever lied about your hit points, or if you have bought the published module that your GM is using, then accept it – you are a cheater and you are pathetic.
Number Three:
Have you ever taken the time to get a group of people together to game then had the game you planned to run taken away from you?
It happened to me years ago. And I’m still a little irritated by it.
That same person also stole several of my game ideas.
I don’t mind people using my ideas, but give me credit for it. And do it without slamming me personally first.
Want to know more about that story? Ask and I shall tell.
Number Four:
Don’t tell me that reality shows are all 100% faked. I know things are set up to exploit people but most of them aren’t faked. At best they do a sleight-of-mind.
But don’t get mad at me if I respond by picking on something you like.
I’ve got a funny response, but it’s one of those things I can’t put on here.
Number Five:
If you decide to create a bunch of house-rules for D&D because you don’t like the way the game works, then just play another game. There are a ton of them out there to choose from, new and old.
Number Six:
Stop pedaling Intelligent Design as science.
It’s not and never could be.
That stuff just ticks me off.
Number Seven:
Being a gamer does not automatically make you smarter than everyone else. If you honestly think you are that smart then for Christ’s sake put down the gaming books and go cure cancer.
Otherwise shut up before I punch you in the back of the head.
Let’s see how smart you are after that.
Number Eight:
If you want to argue something, like a rules interpretation, don’t expect people to just bow down and accept your idea as golden.
Also, if you’ve ever lost an argument, then accept it and move on. Don’t keep arguing a lost point. It’s both sad and funny to watch.
Now an actual debate is an entirely different thing.
An adult debate to come to a good conclusion is a good thing.
Huffing, puffing, and stomping your feet until people give up and accept your demands is not a good thing. It’s a spoiled brat thing.
Number Nine:
If you think you can do a better game design, go design a new game.
Stop whining about what’s out there now and solve your problem.
Maybe then you’ll see how hard it is to do it.
Number Ten:
If you have one of those machines near you that takes a picture of you speeding while driving in your car and then you receive your ticket by mail, raise some hell.
I hate those machines. I’ve never received a ticket from one, but it feels just plain wrong that those machines are even used.
If I get a ticket, I want it to be from a real live cop. (Yeah, it’s happened twice – expensive too.)
Number Eleven:
Dear Dennis Miller,
You sold out.
You’ve lost every right to tell me jack squat. So shut up and disappear.
Of course that’s just my opinion.
I could be wrong.
Number Twelve:
Did anyone honestly think Britney Spears was going to be the perfect mother?
I have a further argument about stupid people and Natural Selection, but that would be too mean when a baby is involved.
Number Thirteen:
Get a sense of humor.
If you’ve thought that anything I’ve said is just plain wrong and offensive, then go away.
I wrote it all for fun, so let it go.
Besides, I warned you before I started the list.
For a while I’ve wanted to make another blog just so I could have a place to go and half-rant and half-joke. But things like that always seem to come back and bite me. Damn shame because I’ve got some interesting, crazy, and funny ideas that I think should be implemented.
Hmmm, I wonder if George Carlin needs some help with writing.
So this blog entry is going to be me letting off some steam before I explode. It’s just some quick thoughts and rants I’ve got.
If you’re easily offended, you should probably stop reading this now.
Even though I’ve cleaned it up a little from what I really want to say.
Number One:
When in a conversation at the game store, if the story about what your character did requires more than a single breath to tell, then don’t bother telling the story. First you give a little starter sentence. If the person you’re talking to responds and asks for more information, then you’ve piqued their interest and you may continue. Otherwise, move along little boy, you’re irritating me.
Number Two:
If you’ve ever cheated while gaming and are 21 years old or more, then you don’t understand the true meaning of the word “challenge”.
A real challenge in D&D is when you’ve had to look at your character sheet in the hopes of finding something, anything that will get you out of the scrape you’re in.
If you’ve ever rolled the dice until you got the number you wanted, then left it there and said you rolled it, or if you’ve ever lied about your hit points, or if you have bought the published module that your GM is using, then accept it – you are a cheater and you are pathetic.
Number Three:
Have you ever taken the time to get a group of people together to game then had the game you planned to run taken away from you?
It happened to me years ago. And I’m still a little irritated by it.
That same person also stole several of my game ideas.
I don’t mind people using my ideas, but give me credit for it. And do it without slamming me personally first.
Want to know more about that story? Ask and I shall tell.
Number Four:
Don’t tell me that reality shows are all 100% faked. I know things are set up to exploit people but most of them aren’t faked. At best they do a sleight-of-mind.
But don’t get mad at me if I respond by picking on something you like.
I’ve got a funny response, but it’s one of those things I can’t put on here.
Number Five:
If you decide to create a bunch of house-rules for D&D because you don’t like the way the game works, then just play another game. There are a ton of them out there to choose from, new and old.
Number Six:
Stop pedaling Intelligent Design as science.
It’s not and never could be.
That stuff just ticks me off.
Number Seven:
Being a gamer does not automatically make you smarter than everyone else. If you honestly think you are that smart then for Christ’s sake put down the gaming books and go cure cancer.
Otherwise shut up before I punch you in the back of the head.
Let’s see how smart you are after that.
Number Eight:
If you want to argue something, like a rules interpretation, don’t expect people to just bow down and accept your idea as golden.
Also, if you’ve ever lost an argument, then accept it and move on. Don’t keep arguing a lost point. It’s both sad and funny to watch.
Now an actual debate is an entirely different thing.
An adult debate to come to a good conclusion is a good thing.
Huffing, puffing, and stomping your feet until people give up and accept your demands is not a good thing. It’s a spoiled brat thing.
Number Nine:
If you think you can do a better game design, go design a new game.
Stop whining about what’s out there now and solve your problem.
Maybe then you’ll see how hard it is to do it.
Number Ten:
If you have one of those machines near you that takes a picture of you speeding while driving in your car and then you receive your ticket by mail, raise some hell.
I hate those machines. I’ve never received a ticket from one, but it feels just plain wrong that those machines are even used.
If I get a ticket, I want it to be from a real live cop. (Yeah, it’s happened twice – expensive too.)
Number Eleven:
Dear Dennis Miller,
You sold out.
You’ve lost every right to tell me jack squat. So shut up and disappear.
Of course that’s just my opinion.
I could be wrong.
Number Twelve:
Did anyone honestly think Britney Spears was going to be the perfect mother?
I have a further argument about stupid people and Natural Selection, but that would be too mean when a baby is involved.
Number Thirteen:
Get a sense of humor.
If you’ve thought that anything I’ve said is just plain wrong and offensive, then go away.
I wrote it all for fun, so let it go.
Besides, I warned you before I started the list.
posted by BlueBlackRed at 10:57 AM
5 Comments:
So what's the story behind number 3?
I don't think Brtiney is a bad mom. Seriously think about this: Look at all the politcally correcy ways they are to protect children now a days vs. what there was when I was a baby (mid 70's). By all accounts if we take today's safety standards as gospel I should have been dead, and a lot of other people too.
I am more concerneced about the people who have to have the latest pic of a celeb....
my 2 cents
Oh and yes loved the WLD blogs and the new ones too. Keep it up
Scott
I may post the story behind #3 sometime. But if you really want it, give me your e-mail address and I'll send it to you when I have the time.
As for Mrs. Spears, I really don't care if I never see her again. And I hope she gets all that she deserves.
>:)
And thank you for kind words about the blog.
You sure talk about punching people in the back of the head alot! LOL! I've read the WLD blog from beginning to end and will soon be running my own. It was a good prep tool. I think I learned alot about what I'll need to do to run WLD from reading your blog. Thanks!
Hmmm...
There sure are a lot of people named Anonymous.
The "punch in the back of the head" thing comes from an old (and thus better) episode of The Simpson's.
It's when Homer realizes that he's been getting picked on by Lenny. So he says, "Tomorrow I'm going to punch Lenny in the back of the head." Then he does. I don't know why I think it's funny, it just is.
What did I teach you about running the WLD? Ban the Polymorph spell? Trick the players into leaving monsters alone?
Oh, and you're welcome.
...time to go to work now...
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